Tip: Three buzz-kill phrases that rub people the wrong way.
According to John Bowe, a speech and presentation consultant, and author of “I Have Something to Say: Mastering the Art of Public Speaking in an Age of Disconnection” these are three buzz-kill phrases:
1. "Here's the thing..."
"This is a top-down phrase. It is as if the speaker is the only one who knows 'the thing'”. John Bowe calls it a throat-clearing statement. Perfect description!
Better option: "I think...."
2. "We'll figure out a way."
“Bowe suggests this phrase is a particular sin of business leaders, who use it to shut down any discussion of employees' reservations or problems.”
Better option: "Let's talk about it, maybe we are missing something."
3. "It is what it is."
This is total buzz-kill. It basically shuts down the conversation.
Better option: There are ways to soften harsh realities or to look for other perspectives. If the other person is complaining or looking for sympathy, make them feel that they have been heard, and that you empathize, even if you can’t do anything about the situation.
SHEPA LEARNING COMPANY WEEKLY POSITIVE NETWORKING® TIP
No. 1040, December 13, 2023
By Gayle Hallgren and Judy Thomson